How The US Legalized Corruption

White people use funny words for bribes
6 min readFeb 5, 2021
Janet Yellen has taken $7.2 million in bribes, what the local white tribes call ‘speaking fees’.

If you give an American politician $100,000, it’s a bribe. If you pay them the same amount for lunch, however, that’s a fundraiser. If you wire the incoming Treasury Secretary $1,000,000 that’s a bribe. If you put her in front of a lectern, however, it’s a speaking fee. Forgive me if I don’t understand. White people sure have funny words for bribes.

$100,000 a plate dinners… are bribes

Americans have this thing called a fundraiser where you put a pile of bribes on a table, wave a wand of asparagus over it, and it just disappears. Access is still bought, but somehow because people ate food, it’s not corruption anymore. The press will literally report on the food.

In New York last weekend, $100,000 got donors a plate of grilled chicken and asparagus, a posed picture with President Trump in a palatial, 60-foot-long entryway, and a 20-minute group chat with the president. (Washington Post)

WTF is this? In any other country you wouldn’t report on the chicken, you’d report on the corruption. However, American politics follows the escort rule. If you have dinner first, then you’re not paying for ‘it’. While sex work is honest work, however, these political meals are just naked corruption.



Indrajit (Indi) Samarajiva is a Sri Lankan writer. Follow me at, or just email me at